Resolve Conflict with Logic
Einstein believes the best way to resolve conflict is with logic. I’ll show you how.
Einstein taught: To solve a problem, he said, simply see it from a different perspective.
First determine if the conflict is an emotional issue or a logical one.
If it is a logical issue: “This will work and this will not work” you determine. To solve the logical conflict, move to the emotional side of the brain.
Here are some exercises and new thoughts that will lead, guide and direct you to a more emotional way of looking at your life, as well as conflicts. Have fun working the training exercises. They are short and to the point. Your answers will surprise you.
Your Conflict issues were created before you were three (3) years old.
They are responsible for the strengths and weakness in your conflicts, creating judgments of yourself and others, imprinting your brain at the most impressionable time in your life.
Your first three years determined how you feel about conflict today.
It is my purpose to inform and explain in simple ways how to think emotionally about conflict. You feel comfortable and confident when seeing a problem logically, and uncomfortable during emotional conflicts. It is time to learn how to think rationally (logically) about emotionally conflict.
When you learn to see conflict with logic rather than fear, your path will slowly change from fear to confidence. This is all about finding your core values and void, while learning the core values and voids those of your adversary.
Our earliest memories determined the outcome of our conflicts. 80% of these memories were created, and based on the perceptions of a child. These perceptions become our road-map to solving conflict. Early emotional perceptions will tend to override logic in conflicts because they are primary connections.
You create your realities by your perceptions. When you change your
perceptions, you change your realities…then you will change your life.
Let’s see if this holds true in your life. I am going to ask you to take a trip back to your earliest childhood memories.
Remember the sights and sounds of your room, and your family. Stand back – see and feel your earliest emotions. See yourself in your room.
- What is the first emotion you feel?
- What dominated your thoughts of yourself?
- What was most missing in your little life?
Make a mental list of at least 3 things that you remembered as Most missing. Think about the emotions these memories bring up.
Time to change gears and imagine you are all grown up. Close your eyes and imagine you are in a room filled with everyone you have ever known in your life. Take a moment to visualize your guests. Family, friends, mentors, and enemies, are all here with you. Close your eyes, take your time and visualize your life in their eyes.
What 3 things would you be most proud to hear them say about you?
- Compare this list and the list from Exercise I.
- Determine if you found the following to be true…
Whatever you perceived as MOST missing in your life created your Greatest Value.
Without the perception of something missing, you would not be the person you value today.
The added advantage of understanding this philosophy, and the effect it has had on you, is to give you peace of mind and confidence to succeed.
Think about it: If you have something, you don’t value it, because you already have it. It is the things you don’t have that you value, so those are the things you give your children. They don’t value them because they already have them. Discover what they value and will find your adversary’s weakness.
Conflicts help us to understand ourselves.
When you learn to manage your conflicts, rather than fear them, your path will slowly change from stress to confidence.
Answer the questions below. This time answer the questions as you think your opponent would answer.
What is he most proud of?
Look to the 7 areas of life to help you: Financial, Social, Family, Career, Spiritual, Physical, and Mental help you find his values.
Find the void (the opposite of his value) and you will have logical answers you are seeking.
List 10 traits you most admire in your opponent. Use those traits to find common ground to resolve the conflict.
It is the core issues that are at fault in most conflicts and core values that will solve them.
You can’t see something in someone that you don’t have within yourself. It is the things we like about others, that are the things we value about ourselves.
The things you see in others that you dislike, are the things you most dislike about yourself.
Another fun exercise is to list the BENEFITS of losing the conflict. Remember we need to look at the problem from an entirely different perspective.
You are always on my mind and in my heart as I work to reach you, teach you and soften your stress.
Please let me know how this works for you.